Healing is a never ending journey…

The end of another year and so much to reflect on.  In 2018 I changed careers, published my first book, spoke at several venues, exercised, meditated, ate pretty well, and overall had an amazing year.  Right after Thanksgiving, after being with my family and enjoying every minute, I crashed.  I had no appetite, wasn’t sleeping, didn’t want to exercise, and fell into a deep slump for several days.  When I realized I hadn’t eaten or slept in two days, I knew it was time to tell someone, so I called my big sister.  How could this happen to me?  I am a coach.  I know what to do to stay healthy.  I always see the brighter side.  I always see the good in everything.  How could I be feeling so low?  I did not have the answers, but what was very clear was that I was here now and needed help.  Talking was the first step for me.  Getting beyond the shame of “how could this happen to me” and moving into why this was happening to me was the next step.

As I began to talk and reflect,  I started to gain more and more clarity.  The last 10 years of my life have been very challenging.  Although I did so much work on myself, and accomplished more than I could have imagined,  I didn’t allow myself to feel the pain, and I am realizing that I skipped a very important step along the way…healing.  A close friend and mentor said to me, “the work you’ve done has prepared you for the journey that is still ahead.” I often tell my clients that “getting off the porch” is a journey…not a destination.  And now my own life has shown me (again) that as soon as I got a little comfortable, the universe shook things up (more accurately…shook me up) and reminded me that the next leg of the journey starts now.

The last several weeks were very scary for me because I had never experienced anxiety or depression to this level.  It has given me a greater understanding and compassion for others that might be struggling.  If you are reading this, perhaps you’ve felt this low before and did not know what to do or why it was happening.  It is a terrifying place to be.  Here are a few things you could do if you find yourself in this scary unfamiliar place:

1. Call and talk to someone! A friend, a family member, a mental health provider.
2. Eat…even if you don’t want to.
3. Meditate for clarity and for sleep (insight timer, or calm are great apps)
4. Walk outside for 20 or more minutes…even if you don’t want to.
5. See a healthcare provider that can help you get control of the anxiety so you can begin to see clearly.
6. Seek counseling…take the first step.
7. Talk to someone! I know this is repeated, but it is so important I wanted to say it again.

I am in a much better place, and would not be here without doing all of the above.  The clarity that I gained over the last few weeks has been the source of the word I’ve chosen for 2019.  I’ve chosen “healing” as my word for the year.  Though I’ve been busy working on me, working on my business, working with my clients, I wasn’t taking the time to pause, feel, or heal.  I just kept moving forward.  So though it is scary, I will pause and face my pain and sadness, so that I can heal and move forward with a clear, open, and loving heart.  I will begin on Jan 1 with the following every day:

1. I will start my day with at least a 20 minute walk of gratitude, followed by a breakfast that includes protein…I will stop and have lunch, drink more water throughout the day, and stop working at a reasonable time.
2. I will go to bed by or before 11pm and shut off all technology by 10:30pm.
3. I will wake every day between 6-7am with meditation, walking, and journaling.
4. I will seek counseling to gain clarity, healing, and resolution in several areas of my life.
5. I will embrace being human and needing help when needed.

I am very excited about 2019 and all that will unfold.  There are several mountains to climb, and yet I am super prepared and ready to climb them.  Stay tuned as I will be sharing monthly the ups, downs, and in-betweens along the way.  I am so grateful for each one of you who have and continue to be with me through it all…My prayer and mission is that by sharing my story, I can help others one step, one day, one hour, and one story at a time.

I would love to hear from you…send me a message or comment below!  Each one of us has a story to share that can help someone along the way…

Happy New Year!

Start your journey off the porch and purchase your copy today!